Just some crap about me

Hilo again... Well, thought I would throw out some stuff about my music - you know, stuff search engines like :-) Here's about the musical me!
I started playing guitar when I was 15 becuase I thought it would be "cool". I really liked the idea of being a rock star - seemed right up my alley! That and I really was not into school at the time... this seemed like a good career choice! i wish i had really taken it seriously. Like most things I attempted around this time, I apporached it half-assed. I didn't practice like I should have. It came naturally to me, so I didn't put real effort into it. I'd be a much better player had I focus on really learning the instrument.
I loved the guitar though. It felt commfortable, felt like a real part of me. From the first moments of picking up the guitar, I created my own music. heree and there I would learn bits and pieces of various songs, but I always wanted too do my own thing. I wanted to create... funnny, around the same time i started writingn poetry too - guessing it was the teenage angst thing. Guess I never grew out of it!
I ended up going to the Musicians Institute of Technology in Hollywierd, CA for guitar. That was a great experience, but again, wish I would have put a bit more into it. I did learn a lot and met some great people and made some life long friends.
So, here I am, almosot 20 years into my music lack of a career. I am writing in more genres and styles than ever and have such an open mind to creating. I am excited to see where I go next!
My styles range from acoustic oriented rock, which I write a lot of. I like the feel - upbeat, driving, yet easy on the ears. I am still seeking a vocalist that can help me take it to where it needs to be. I like edge to my acoustic rock stuff. I want that driving sound. I love dynamics - hills and valleys... sounds that push the emotion of the words. Words are important, but I will admit that I rarely pay attention to them! Hey, I am a guitar player! As long as I get to play guitar... :))
I am getting into another heavy phase right now... i am writing some really heavy, chunky and driving tunes. I have strung two of my guitars in low B - I love the sound. There's a heavy bluesy song in B on my site called Black Dove. It is ok, but needs some tweaking - not quite there yet.
I also really like the quiet, ethereal, trippy, spacey stuff. I have quite a few songs along those lines and would love to do a whole album of that kind of stuff. There are a couple samples of that on my site too!
then there is my progressive side - I love the epic constantly changing complicated music. Not much commerecial viability in that stuff, but it sure is fun to play!
Those are my main styles. Check out the site www.FranzHoff.com and you can hear for yourself!
I don't feel like writing anymore about this, so I am going to go on to something else! Until the next time! PL&P!

Felt like writing a new poem

So here goes... Off the cuff as they say...

Lemme try again... didn't like that... here goes...

Look at the walls
They surround and confine
Are they really there?
Or created by our minds?
If you look hard enough
You will soon see
They are not really there
They're simply painful memories
Stacked upon one another
The memories fade
Losing their distinction
Yet the pain is the same
To protect, we build
Yet it only veils us
An imaginary shelter
We think protects us
Hiding from feelings
We think makes us free
But the walls constrict
Til we can't even breathe
Tear down the walls
Feel freedoms soft breeze
Be strong be brave
Set your soul free

Well, hmm... not great, but it is something. There is a poem or song sitting, hiding inside of me - I can feel it, I just have not been able to coax it out yet... PL&P!
Franz.

Update to previous thoughts

Goodmorning world! Well, I was thinking about wht I wrote yesterday, although, I did not read it after I wrote it so I am not entirely sure what is there! I do that frequently; I enjoy off the cuff writing. But one thought came to mind and I wanted to be sure I clarified soemthing. I may have come off sounding like I feel "better than" other people -"more aware" oooh... well, that is not my position at all. Quite the contrary if anything.
I am of the thought (not belief, more on that another time) that when you boil us down, we taste like chicken.. no wait, that's a different story... when you strip us down we get cold... Hmmm, no, that's not it either... ok, sorry... not really sorry... it is still early...
Basically I think of us all as equals - we have differnet experiences and feelings that we draw from to live as we fit. One that is "more aware" is no better than one that is "less aware", we are just at differnet stages of development. I do not put myself on any type of pedastal, I do not think myself superior to anyone else. I know that my knowledge is very limited and I know that there is so much for me to learn and experience and I truly an easger to learn and grow as much as possible. I just wanted to qualify my statements so that I do not come across as
"holier than thou" as I know I can sound like that sometimes and sometimes I get on a soapbox and spew my nonsense without thinking. I am also sure that at many points along the way, I will contradict myself, I will stumble, I will fall and I most assuredly will get back up and continue on.
And you know what? I am looking forward to it! Adversity brings growth. For some bizarre reason, we humans thrive on adversity. We seem to be incapable to learning anything unless we suffer first. And sometimes we choose to suffer over and over again before we learn!
Well, it is back to work for me. I am still pondering and contemplating, wondering and being amazed. Like, I wonder if anyone will actually read all this crap :D PL&P
Franz.

Poem for today - Bright Spots

BRIGHT SPOTS

I find myself

Questioning again

Who is it that I am?

Why, what and how?

Are these firing synapses

Merely random discharges?

Is there reason behind?

I see sometimes

So clearly it scares me

Then it fades to gray

And once again

I am lost to the randomness

Of this lost society

I find another bright spot

I reach for it

It is warm and comforting

It is familiar and enriching

Symbiotic in the exchange

Sometimes the brightness grows

Sometimes it moves away

Sometimes it stays

Sometimes it fades out

Tears fill my soul at each

As I realize that it is me

That fades at times

And there is another seeing

Another that crys

Then I awake from "reality"

And look up with arms outstretched

And see all the amazing bright spots

And know that they never really fade

Even when change brings pain

And it seems the light has gone

It is still there watching

We have only to look, see and feel it…

A Blogger profile question gone awry...

Ok... I took this question a littel too seriously... but was on a role and couldn't stop! This is all off the cuff - that is how most of my writing is... Without further ado...
"The children are waiting! Please tell them the story about the bald frog with the wig:"

Once there was a regal frog name Clifton. He was a very dashing and handsome frog with long, luxurious golden hair, but always a bit nosey. Well, one day he saw a beautiful princess sitting on the dock on his pond, with her feet dangling gently in the water. She was scrubbing some foamy stuff on her legs... Being the nosey type, he HAD to take a closer look - she had great legs after all and we all know about frogs and legs! He hopped up onto the dock next to her, startling her. She jumped, screamed and spilled the whole bottle of foamy stuff right on top of his head! She gasped, staring at this large lump of foam sitting next to her. The bottle of foamy stuff, lying on it side next to him. She parted the foam away from the frogs face to see if he was ok. "PLEASE! Rinse this icky foamy stuff off of me!" croaked the frog. So the Princess picked him up gently and set him into the water. The indignant frog dove down into the water and came back up and hopped back onto he dock about to give the Princess a piece of his mind. The look of horror on her face made him pause. He noticed her eyes darting from him to a small pile of golden thread next to him... then it hit him... that was not thread!!! He frantically felt his head... Then looked down into the water to see hi reflection. A long bloodcurdling screaming croak emitted from the frogs throat. He croaked and croaked and croaked, until he nearly croaked. He looked over at the bottle and read "NAIR" Sobbing he looked up at the beautiful princess. Feeling quite sorry for the poor frog, she quickly thought of a grand plan! She tenderly picked up the frog and said "do not fret my noble frog, I have a plan to restore you to your former grandeur!" Setting him down, she scooped up the small pile of golden hair and dashed off to her castle. The frog, dazed and traumatized by the whole ordeal just stared blankly off towards the grand castle, waiting... Three days passed. The frog did not budge. He sat in his stupor, starring blankly, waiting. On the fourth day, feeling more hopeless than ever, he saw the Princess running full speed towards the pond. Panting heavily, she sits next to Clifton and holds out a small box to him, a huge satisfied smile upon her face. Clifton looked up at her questioningly and slowly open the little package. As he removed the top, he let of a croak of excitement! There, in that little box was his long, luxurious golden hair all neatly made into a spectacular little wig! She gently took it out and placed it up his little frog head. Amazed, he looked down into the water and there he saw the most regal of frogs, his long, luxurious golden hair waving gently in the breeze. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Declared the frog. The princess bent down gently to kiss him... at that, is how they really met!

Randomness

Well, I've got a few minutes to kill and thoughts I'd see what some spontaneous typing would present... I am a bit tired today. I guess that photoshoot last night wore me out more than I thought it would. It was a good shoot though. We got some really wild shots - lots of feeling. I am really looking forward to seeing what we come up with, this photographer and I. We have a game plan for the next couple of shoots, but beyond that...
Before I go further, let me appologize in advance for my tpying... I am usually too lazy for spell check and my typing skills are lacking.
So, here's my scoop... have been in a pondering mood lately - really pondering. Back to the whole meaning of life crap. Looking at events and people thorugh out my life and looking at where I am now. Quite strange to look at. I don't feel like I am as old as I am and most people don't think I look that old, which I guess is good. Yet, on the other hand, I feel very old sometimes... weary, tired. I have a hard time relating to many people - hmmm... actually, I have always had a hard time relating to people, so not sure whta th hell I am talking about. I have always felt like I am on the outside looking in. There are not too many people that I really feel like I can connect with - that I feel can understand the real me. I fit in just fine whereever I go, but that's just my camelion abilities coming out. The staus quo has always annoyed me and the benality of everyday life has always lef me wondering what we as a species are heading towards. Did I mention that I LOVE peanut butter! That right there! That is a great reason to be alive!! Mmmm... damn, wish I had some right now... I am hungry... Gues a banana will have to do.
I look at the world and am amazed that we have come as far as we have as a species... we are so on the brink of self destruction. It is not even greed anymore - it is apathy and self centeredness. The world is so self absorbed that no one has the time to think of anyone else but themselves anymore. Not the old lady who needs a hand with her groceries, not their neighbors and not even their own children. Really sad... kindof fits with a poem I wrote a littel while back...
THE ROSE
Racing Around Ourselves
In the flight of life
Scenery is flashing by
To fast to watch the rose
Consumed with our quests
Of the things not real
Just one more - then another
To absorbed to see the rose
Onto our social stepping stone
We climb with vigor
Grasping for what he has
To busy to touch the rose
Non-stop twenty four seven
No time to even sleep
We blaze with intentions
To tired to play with the rose
Now the end is nearing
Blurriness finally clears
Frightened, saddened realization
To late, the rose is gone
HELLOOOOOO! Wake up world... this world is so lost it is frightening. I write hoping that I can touch someone to open their eyes and see a littel more clearly -to help them help themselves to find a better way. I am not leader or a teacher, jsut a shmoe that does see a little more clearly and it constantly wroking towards seeing more clearly. I want ot share that. There are a few out there that I have come across that do see - littel circles... Seems so difficult to reach out to those that do not see that are stuck in what they think are things of importnace.
I am truly a glass half full person... always, when a question or comments comes up relating to that I will, without thinking say half full - or whatever analogy fits at the time. So, I keep on going and learning and growing and stumbling... I make mistakes, I trip and forget and somehow keep managing to kick myself hard enough to remember again.
I love learning and growing and sharing. I love stimulate the grey matter. Music an poetry are what really do it for me. Thoruhg them, I am able to express myself wholly. I am not really an open person. I have never liked to let people in - working on that... But somehow, music takes away all inhibitions and I am slowly finding ways to bring that into my everyday life. I am... and I am learning to be more me.
Well... time to run off and play som emusic! Think happy thoughts, be kind, have compassion, be understanding, learn acceptance and let your hearts be full oflove. PL&P
Franz.

The Purpose

Well... this is my newest forum to promote me! Franz Hoff. My original music, my poetry and myself :) Blogs seem like a natural way to share and promote. I think it is a great way to extend my reach.
This blog will contain my poetry and writings, links to my music and possibly some pix as well. The ultimate goal is to get people to visit my site and listen to the music.
Music and poetry are my way of sharing myself and my thoughts with the world. Are my thoughts/opinions/feelings right? Who knows - I don't really subscribe to the, "my way is the right way". I try to provoke thoughts and feelings through my work. If it touches you in some way, makes you think a little deeper, ponder a little more, feel a little harder, then I have accomplished my task. That is not to say that everything I do is all serious - occasionally I will delve into matters with more brevity. But, for the most part, I am more morose and dark and always trying to maintain a link to the light. Please, visit my web site: www.FranzHoff.com and share your feelings about what you read and hear. I love to hear feedback and I love to exchange thoughts. PL&P!